It was only several weeks ago that I discovered this apparently off-the-hook famous, what I would call 人氣旺盛 character by the name of 張杰 from the Mainland, not to be confused with the Taiwanese 張傑. I first discovered him in Wilber Pan's new video 愛x愛 (love x love), a Mainland Taiwan collaborative to support the "I Want to Go to School" campaign. Two things stuck out to me. 1) His vocals, and 2) the fact that he wore a wedding ring.
Soon enough, I found myself looking up this "new" artist and some of his works. Obviously, he really isn't that new, I am just usually extremely slow when it comes to pop culture - 慢人一拍 (slower than others by a beat) is the sad reality. Anyway, one of the few songs that made it to the top of my list is "First Lady" 第一夫人. Cute concept and sweet, especially since he was so obviously in love with his then girlfriend, and now, wifey - hence the ring! Little did I know...
This favorite of mine was actually composed and conceptualized by none other but my favorite Wang Lee Hom. You can imagine how dumbfounded I was upon making this discovery... as in. ARE. YOU. SERIOUS? I really cannot escape WLH for life! Per Xiao Zhang's request (but with no response for quite a while), WLH came up with the genius idea of "first lady" for not only Xiao Zhang's lovebird fans, but also (maybe even more so) a gift to and representation of him and his lover. Lee Hom popped a mini demo in good ol' Lee Hom fashion - keys, humming to the envisioned chorus melody, and ending it with a to-die-for 我的第一夫人 (my first lady). Explanation? You do not need to be the president to have a first lady. Your loved one IS your first lady. Cute or whaaaat?
Now, moving on to the crazier.
Last night, in my slightly obsessive trance, I posted the following on my secret weibo (a.k.a. chinarr twitter account):
最近才開始聼張杰先生的作品。除了他的聲音以外，另外一件讓我非常感動的事就是他可能是在演藝圈比較年輕，結了婚以後還一直帶著婚戒的男生！敬佩。so cute!
Roughly translates to: I only recently started listening to Mr. Zhang Jie's work. Aside from his vocals, another touching thing that I noticed is that he is probably one of the few married youngins in the entertainment circle who still continually wears his wedding ring after his wedding! Respect. so cute!
When I checked back today for my daily post, I almost thought I ridiculously signed into the wrong account because there were notifications for 130+ comments, 550+ retweets, and a good 10+ new followers. HOW IN THE WORLD DID PEOPLE COME ACROSS MY POST when I did not even tag the guy! or his wife! Talkin' bout crazy-on-it fans! Not to mention how I now have random followers of my definitely not famous life (thank God I never post anything private on that thang)! What just happened?! 張杰 is really a phenomenon over there. Unbelievable!
Thanks to my Chinese clients, I now have a much better grasp and understanding of Mainland accented Chinese, but I think my mandarin will always sound more Taiwanese. The influences set foot at an early enough age to make current change difficult.
Sunday, October 14, 2012
Saturday, October 13, 2012
These Vagabond Shoes [Part I]
For many years, my count for countries-traveled-to have been much higher than that of states-traveled-to. I still have ways to go before the state count surpasses the country one, but at least I can now happily add one more state to my measly list of three! If you did not already pick up on the reference of my blog post title, it is a phrase from the classic, New York, New York. Yes! I finally made a six day trip to the Big Apple with two other hao peng you's just about a month ago.
Let's just say that it was not at all your average relaxing vacation. In fact, for the duration of the trip, all I could think of was FOOT MASSAGE, please, somebody, anybody! I would like to think that I have a decently high tolerance for massive amounts of walking, so I will blame it on my incompetent shoes. Also, to my defense, the average New Yorker surely does not walk the amount we did each day, right?! I mean, as non-frequent-returning tourists, we naturally had to hit up as many tourist attractions as possible!
"How do you like New York?"
Honestly, I think my sentiments differ slightly from the song New York, New York. I do not know if "I want to be a part of it" quite yet. My stance is neutral at this point. I do not dislike it, but I do not necessarily feel a strong desire to immerse myself in the big city. I will probably have to live there for a while to hash out a stronger opinion towards this seemingly coveted place of stay for the gloriously energetic young adult years. I think I will always, always be a California girl though : ) Actually, I even left feeling a bit anxious and fearful should I need to move there for grad school. Somehow, I feel like a bit of a misfit in much of my interests and preferences compared to the supposed norm there, but again, I would need to live there and experience it for myself to come to a more solid conclusion because my basis of comparison at this point is with my friends who currently work and attend grad school there. Good to gather insight, but bad to compare.
Because it has already been a while since my return and because I already have other subject matters lined up for blogging, this entry will unfortunately be put to a halt. Perhaps I will make a part II come back some day with some gorgeous photos and highlights because there were definitely many despite my seemingly lack of crazy enthusiasm for the city!
 |
| Taken on top of the Empire State Building |
"How do you like New York?"
Honestly, I think my sentiments differ slightly from the song New York, New York. I do not know if "I want to be a part of it" quite yet. My stance is neutral at this point. I do not dislike it, but I do not necessarily feel a strong desire to immerse myself in the big city. I will probably have to live there for a while to hash out a stronger opinion towards this seemingly coveted place of stay for the gloriously energetic young adult years. I think I will always, always be a California girl though : ) Actually, I even left feeling a bit anxious and fearful should I need to move there for grad school. Somehow, I feel like a bit of a misfit in much of my interests and preferences compared to the supposed norm there, but again, I would need to live there and experience it for myself to come to a more solid conclusion because my basis of comparison at this point is with my friends who currently work and attend grad school there. Good to gather insight, but bad to compare.
Because it has already been a while since my return and because I already have other subject matters lined up for blogging, this entry will unfortunately be put to a halt. Perhaps I will make a part II come back some day with some gorgeous photos and highlights because there were definitely many despite my seemingly lack of crazy enthusiasm for the city!
Thursday, October 4, 2012
"Another virtue of Los Angeles is getting to sing in the car"
An awesome excerpt from the very words of the good looking Joseph Gordon Levitt.
"I lived in New York for nine years, and I decided to move back to L.A. because I like having a space where I can just freak out if I want to. I have a house where I can yell at the top of my lungs. In New York, if you start singing at the top of your lungs, no matter where you are on the island of Manhattan, someone’s going to hear you. Another virtue of Los Angeles is getting to sing in the car. I miss that when I’m out of town. Even though the traffic’s a bitch, it’s nice to have such a private environment to listen to music.
Los Angeles is a hard city to show to people because I think what’s charming about it are the people. It’s not like New York or Paris, where I’ll take you to this great neighborhood and we’ll walk around and it’s gorgeous. L.A. doesn’t really have that. When friends are in town, what I’m excited to do is introduce them to other friends of mine, and that usually happens at someone’s house. When you’re in New York City, you’re in New York City, and it defines a lot of your experience. But when you’re in L.A., you can make your own experience. There’s so much more space, you have the room to make your own world."
I've never lived in NY, but this is such an interesting, insightful, and silly way of making LA look so. good! I think I agree though : ) I must look absolutely ridiculous in the car.
For the full article, please visit LA Mag. I am currently on a writing hiatus, mainly owing to a horrendous episode of writer's block. Feeling so uninspired as of late. Ugh. Let's hope my NY post will make an appearance before a topic of greater interest comes up.
"I lived in New York for nine years, and I decided to move back to L.A. because I like having a space where I can just freak out if I want to. I have a house where I can yell at the top of my lungs. In New York, if you start singing at the top of your lungs, no matter where you are on the island of Manhattan, someone’s going to hear you. Another virtue of Los Angeles is getting to sing in the car. I miss that when I’m out of town. Even though the traffic’s a bitch, it’s nice to have such a private environment to listen to music.
Los Angeles is a hard city to show to people because I think what’s charming about it are the people. It’s not like New York or Paris, where I’ll take you to this great neighborhood and we’ll walk around and it’s gorgeous. L.A. doesn’t really have that. When friends are in town, what I’m excited to do is introduce them to other friends of mine, and that usually happens at someone’s house. When you’re in New York City, you’re in New York City, and it defines a lot of your experience. But when you’re in L.A., you can make your own experience. There’s so much more space, you have the room to make your own world."
I've never lived in NY, but this is such an interesting, insightful, and silly way of making LA look so. good! I think I agree though : ) I must look absolutely ridiculous in the car.
For the full article, please visit LA Mag. I am currently on a writing hiatus, mainly owing to a horrendous episode of writer's block. Feeling so uninspired as of late. Ugh. Let's hope my NY post will make an appearance before a topic of greater interest comes up.
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Hand Prints.
July 5th, 2012 - today - marks my one year anniversary as a full-time staff at the IRC. It was a very unique day that allowed for me to reflect upon my journey up to date, a "today" happening that looks towards the future, and also a monumental first accident after 6 years of driving - got rear ended on the freeway on my way home from work. If you do not want to read on, which I do not blame you for as it will not differ from most of my other posts in length, just know that God's hand prints couldn't have been more obvious in these instances, and in my life.
THE JOURNEY FROM ART TO SOCIAL WORK
As some of you may know, my undergraduate studies was in art... sort of... "Interdisciplinary Computing and the Arts". It was something along the lines of art, computer science, and culture combined. HATED computer science to my guts! Consequently, I focused more on graphic and web design, which led to my minor in Cognitive Science with an emphasis on Human Computer Interaction. I enjoyed the HCI courses much more, hands down. At the end of the day though, I realized what kept me motivated to get through the challenges of a design process was not my love for art itself, but the subject matter in which I was designing for. That was a first step, a solid hint for my eventual career switch. Fast forward a grueling, persevering year of job searching (in all realms, I even applied for Tea Station...) and diligence at the International Rescue Committee as an intern, an assistant caseworker position opened up at the IRC. Obviously, a great experience and stepping stone towards my now decided career path in social work, I jumped on it. Hopes were high, but I prayed very, very hard for the peace and joy that I would need should I get denied the job because it would be who-knows-round-what of disappointment and confusion for my future. Sure enough, the inevitable happened -- REJECTION! I will spare you the details of why, but here is an excerpt of an email I sent out at the time to several close friends who have been following my journey:
In hindsight, it was clearly a miracle for me to experience the peace that I did and another opportunity for me to claim and experience God's promises. Several more weeks pass by with my normal interning routine and extremely unexpectedly, I get called in to speak with our ED again... lo & behold, I GOT THE JOB, and to conclude this section of my entry, here is another email update I sent out that briefly summed up... everything.
Up to this point, I have learned so much about people, about reality, about the flaws of the system, about hope and resilience, all in which, I believe, are great training grounds and confirmation for my future endeavors. I can't thank God enough for how He has prepared me and led me to this point.
THE "TODAY" HAPPENING
I do not have too much work experience and cannot say that I've gone through too much "office politics". I hear about it a lot from my mom, from others, and I am usually quite enraged just listening to how ridiculous, how dark, selfish, and unreasonable people can be. On the contrary, I have been shielded and blessed by awesome coworkers and currently, an awesome, awesome interim director. I've deemed A.E.R. as my IRC hero, and undoubtedly, an individual I greatly admire. Per my request, A.E.R. met with me today to address some of my questions and concerns, but the session ended up lasting one whole hour! To an entry level assistant caseworker, a personal hour-long meeting with the acting ED who was previously the deputy VP of IRC's national programs was really something! There are several characteristics that I took note of and would want to bring with me if one day I am in some or any type of management/leadership position (of course, given the appropriate office setting, size and make up of staff and whatnot):
REAR-ENDED
This one-year-anniversary date is really something! Ended the day with a nice little secondary impact from a three-car accident that I was involved in on the freeway. First accident involvement ever since I started driving approximately eight years ago, and I am so very grateful for the minimal impact that I received. Despite the fact, I was still feeling a bit anxious and frantic because, well it's still a first! KNOWING what to do never seems to successfully play itself out when you need it to. Never have I been so glad to see a cop before! Ha! Praise God for His protection. Seeing accidents, big and small, happen every day during my commute freaks me out. Life is so, so fragile! I really hope and pray that I "don't waste [my] life".
THE JOURNEY FROM ART TO SOCIAL WORK
As some of you may know, my undergraduate studies was in art... sort of... "Interdisciplinary Computing and the Arts". It was something along the lines of art, computer science, and culture combined. HATED computer science to my guts! Consequently, I focused more on graphic and web design, which led to my minor in Cognitive Science with an emphasis on Human Computer Interaction. I enjoyed the HCI courses much more, hands down. At the end of the day though, I realized what kept me motivated to get through the challenges of a design process was not my love for art itself, but the subject matter in which I was designing for. That was a first step, a solid hint for my eventual career switch. Fast forward a grueling, persevering year of job searching (in all realms, I even applied for Tea Station...) and diligence at the International Rescue Committee as an intern, an assistant caseworker position opened up at the IRC. Obviously, a great experience and stepping stone towards my now decided career path in social work, I jumped on it. Hopes were high, but I prayed very, very hard for the peace and joy that I would need should I get denied the job because it would be who-knows-round-what of disappointment and confusion for my future. Sure enough, the inevitable happened -- REJECTION! I will spare you the details of why, but here is an excerpt of an email I sent out at the time to several close friends who have been following my journey:
that's the gist of it. i think i still have a decently positive
outlook and am hopeful for potential opportunities in terms of IRC.
however, i can't exactly 100% hope in it because it's uncertain and it's
not like i'm guaranteed a position. all i can say is that there's still
potential for it. I am surprisingly pretty OK with it. I was a little
bit bummed when i found out, but that was about it, so i'm really
thankful. during the waiting period, all i could pray for was peace and
joy and a greater trust in God's sovereignty - provision and timing,
because i KNEW for SURE i would be super disappointed and discouraged if
i didn't get it. i guess you can say it's a little miracle :) because
i'm totally fine. and logically, i couldn't even understand how i am,
but i just am and that is definitely God's working and Grace :) so yeap!
don't worry about me! do keep praying though. everything is so up in
the air and it's been a year since i graduated!
In hindsight, it was clearly a miracle for me to experience the peace that I did and another opportunity for me to claim and experience God's promises. Several more weeks pass by with my normal interning routine and extremely unexpectedly, I get called in to speak with our ED again... lo & behold, I GOT THE JOB, and to conclude this section of my entry, here is another email update I sent out that briefly summed up... everything.
After a year of perseverance (well, maybe half a year of active
job-hunting since I decided to change my career path towards the
non-profit sector), i FINALLY obtained a full-time job as a casework assistant
at the International Rescue Committee, which is where I have been
interning since February! It is something I want to do, something I
foresee helping me move towards my career, something that will probably
and hopefully aid in my eventual grad-school application, and not to
mention, it is also with an internationally known non-profit that I
definitely would love to work with!
It has been a long process. There were many ups and downs, excitements and discouragements during this year-long process, and a plethora of dilemmas to consider, including one of utmost concern: passion vs. reality. However, after many series of events, God has once again proven faithful and sovereign over all. His timing is perfect and His Grace is sufficient. Had I obtained the other jobs I applied/interviewed for, I probably would not have had the opportunity to work at this position right now. Had I not sacrificed a few months of negative income (a.k.a losing money on gas) I probably would not even qualify for the position. Had I gotten previous jobs I interviewed for, my pay wouldn't even reach what it is now (though not high, still higher than expected). I can list a whole lot of things, all to testify in the end, that God is good. In more challenging times, He provided sufficient (and even more than expected/asked for sometimes) peace & joy to override my anticipated disappointment and feelings of discouragement. In happier times, well. I had lots of fun sleeping in, eating, hanging out with friends, sleeping, eating, working out, sleeping, eating... you get the point.
sooo for those who are in LA, i guess you won't be hearing me pick up the phone at home anymore (which is rare anyways because I'm probably sleeping), or me opening the door during the day, or me still in bed when you drop your kids off at our place at noon... because i will be in (work location), possibly buried in case notes, heavy-duty mundane tedious paperwork, yelling (just kidding) at welfare office personnel, or trotting new territory in our clients' apartments/houses conducting home visits...
It has been a long process. There were many ups and downs, excitements and discouragements during this year-long process, and a plethora of dilemmas to consider, including one of utmost concern: passion vs. reality. However, after many series of events, God has once again proven faithful and sovereign over all. His timing is perfect and His Grace is sufficient. Had I obtained the other jobs I applied/interviewed for, I probably would not have had the opportunity to work at this position right now. Had I not sacrificed a few months of negative income (a.k.a losing money on gas) I probably would not even qualify for the position. Had I gotten previous jobs I interviewed for, my pay wouldn't even reach what it is now (though not high, still higher than expected). I can list a whole lot of things, all to testify in the end, that God is good. In more challenging times, He provided sufficient (and even more than expected/asked for sometimes) peace & joy to override my anticipated disappointment and feelings of discouragement. In happier times, well. I had lots of fun sleeping in, eating, hanging out with friends, sleeping, eating, working out, sleeping, eating... you get the point.
sooo for those who are in LA, i guess you won't be hearing me pick up the phone at home anymore (which is rare anyways because I'm probably sleeping), or me opening the door during the day, or me still in bed when you drop your kids off at our place at noon... because i will be in (work location), possibly buried in case notes, heavy-duty mundane tedious paperwork, yelling (just kidding) at welfare office personnel, or trotting new territory in our clients' apartments/houses conducting home visits...
Up to this point, I have learned so much about people, about reality, about the flaws of the system, about hope and resilience, all in which, I believe, are great training grounds and confirmation for my future endeavors. I can't thank God enough for how He has prepared me and led me to this point.
THE "TODAY" HAPPENING
I do not have too much work experience and cannot say that I've gone through too much "office politics". I hear about it a lot from my mom, from others, and I am usually quite enraged just listening to how ridiculous, how dark, selfish, and unreasonable people can be. On the contrary, I have been shielded and blessed by awesome coworkers and currently, an awesome, awesome interim director. I've deemed A.E.R. as my IRC hero, and undoubtedly, an individual I greatly admire. Per my request, A.E.R. met with me today to address some of my questions and concerns, but the session ended up lasting one whole hour! To an entry level assistant caseworker, a personal hour-long meeting with the acting ED who was previously the deputy VP of IRC's national programs was really something! There are several characteristics that I took note of and would want to bring with me if one day I am in some or any type of management/leadership position (of course, given the appropriate office setting, size and make up of staff and whatnot):
- Putting effort in understanding the direct service aspect before theorizing away in strategic planning
- Showing genuine interest and acknowledgment for others' work, regardless of seniority
- Being gracious and non-condemning, but never failing to state the problem and simultaneously pushing for positive change
- Allowing room for individual creativity and staff development within the appropriate confines of each employee's responsibilities
REAR-ENDED
This one-year-anniversary date is really something! Ended the day with a nice little secondary impact from a three-car accident that I was involved in on the freeway. First accident involvement ever since I started driving approximately eight years ago, and I am so very grateful for the minimal impact that I received. Despite the fact, I was still feeling a bit anxious and frantic because, well it's still a first! KNOWING what to do never seems to successfully play itself out when you need it to. Never have I been so glad to see a cop before! Ha! Praise God for His protection. Seeing accidents, big and small, happen every day during my commute freaks me out. Life is so, so fragile! I really hope and pray that I "don't waste [my] life".
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
Work.
Next Thursday will be my one year anniversary with the International Rescue Committee as a full-time staff. Time just whizzed past me. I realized I never even got around to writing an entry on my journey from funemployment to getting a job, or from pursuing design to engaging in the field of social services. I looked back on my posts and saw that I had documented my feelings of discouragement and frustration in the job search process through a song called "stuck in Taipei" 困在台北, and then... my blog became notoriously known for its MASSIVE entries :) looks like I completely skipped out on some pretty big life decisions, blessings and grace that I have experienced since then (in the job context)! But, I will revisit those experiences on July 5, 2012 and share them with the few of you who may be reading.
In my near one year with the IRC, I surprisingly did not experience too much stress, considering how much we deal with clients. However, recently I've experienced two waves of it, one in which I cannot disclose due to confidentiality issues, and the other more recent one is due to the lack of capacity to help the amount of clients who are currently enrolled in our programs. I am looking forward to playing some sports this weekend to relieve myself, maybe doodle a picture or two.
We have a very mixed and unique client base, probably enough to cover all extremes. The rich, the poor. The highly educated, the ones who have never gone through formal education. The lazy, the hardworking. The grateful, the annoying and demanding. The torture survivors, the happy dandies who have no problem returning to their home countries if life gets too hard in America. The list goes on. However, helping those who truly need the service is extremely, extremely difficult in this city. Job opportunities are already scarce, let alone securing an actual job! Stress. Stress. Stress. Anytime something involves another person's life and well being, or even survival = STRESS!
You really get a glimpse of reality, much of which is out of our control. Bureaucracy. Incompetent, mean case workers from, elsewhere. The hundreds and thousands of cash-based, tax-evading businesses that obviously work in contrary to what we want and must place our clients in. I am terribly afraid of referring clients to massage parlors / nail and hair salons in fear of the oft-too common shady business that goes on behind those doors, yet those are jobs that a portion of our clients want to do or are working towards, or resorted to due to the lack of opportunities or relevant experience from their home country. LIFE it is. Worse yet, they do not even have it that bad here compared to many parts of the world!
Yet there is the occasional glimmer of hope and heart-warming words and actions that come from our clients. Here is something I recently received via email from a client:
"说实放，我真的好感动，谢谢你，这么晚了还给我发消息，
在美国，有了你们这样的朋友自己才感觉不到孤单"
"truth is, I'm really touched. Thank you for sending me this information even though it is so late. Because I have friends like you guys here in the U.S., I feel a lot less lonely"
Nothing boast-worthy on our end really, but nonetheless encouraging and affirming that despite the minimal service we can offer, it is somehow still making a positive impact on someone's life. I'm actually not quite sure why the email was sent so late because I definitely did not stay up till 3am to send it! Ha.
There are others who are overcome by episodes of anxiety, tantrums, unreasonable fits... yet their lives speak of a perseverance and resilience that I greatly respect and wish I had even more of, as a Christian especially!
I remember several of our clients who came as free cases straight from an African refugee camp (no family here, no friends, barely any language capacity, if any at all) and the few that remained and lived together, one worked day and night shifts on a pay only slightly higher than minimum wage to survive, and covered rent for his "friend" whom he actually met at the refugee camp and had no family relations with. Talkin' about being sacrificial!
Those are probably some of the reasons why I enjoy my job despite the stress and sometimes mental take-home-workload. It has its rewards, but it is definitely a sobering reminder that as humans, we are very limited. Humanitarian work can really only go so far, and I know that ultimately, only Christ can offer lasting hope, joy, and peace that even a good life here in America cannot fulfill. It breaks my heart to hear of people suffering, getting beaten by cops for beliefs that ultimately do not lead to the one true God. It breaks my heart to see many coming to the U.S. not only for protection, but obsessively in search of the American dream that is not eternal (Matt 6:19-21).
I am still learning and exploring how to speak and act in a manner that is Gospel saturated in the context of social services. Many non-Christians in the non-profit sector, in fact most of them are not, are overflowing with love, care, and passion for people and various causes, but from a client's point of view, what distinguishes the Christian case worker from the love, care, and sacrifice of a non-Christian service provider?
In my near one year with the IRC, I surprisingly did not experience too much stress, considering how much we deal with clients. However, recently I've experienced two waves of it, one in which I cannot disclose due to confidentiality issues, and the other more recent one is due to the lack of capacity to help the amount of clients who are currently enrolled in our programs. I am looking forward to playing some sports this weekend to relieve myself, maybe doodle a picture or two.
We have a very mixed and unique client base, probably enough to cover all extremes. The rich, the poor. The highly educated, the ones who have never gone through formal education. The lazy, the hardworking. The grateful, the annoying and demanding. The torture survivors, the happy dandies who have no problem returning to their home countries if life gets too hard in America. The list goes on. However, helping those who truly need the service is extremely, extremely difficult in this city. Job opportunities are already scarce, let alone securing an actual job! Stress. Stress. Stress. Anytime something involves another person's life and well being, or even survival = STRESS!
You really get a glimpse of reality, much of which is out of our control. Bureaucracy. Incompetent, mean case workers from, elsewhere. The hundreds and thousands of cash-based, tax-evading businesses that obviously work in contrary to what we want and must place our clients in. I am terribly afraid of referring clients to massage parlors / nail and hair salons in fear of the oft-too common shady business that goes on behind those doors, yet those are jobs that a portion of our clients want to do or are working towards, or resorted to due to the lack of opportunities or relevant experience from their home country. LIFE it is. Worse yet, they do not even have it that bad here compared to many parts of the world!
Yet there is the occasional glimmer of hope and heart-warming words and actions that come from our clients. Here is something I recently received via email from a client:
"说实放，我真的好感动，谢谢你，这么晚了还给我发消息，
在美国，有了你们这样的朋友自己才感觉不到孤单"
"truth is, I'm really touched. Thank you for sending me this information even though it is so late. Because I have friends like you guys here in the U.S., I feel a lot less lonely"
Nothing boast-worthy on our end really, but nonetheless encouraging and affirming that despite the minimal service we can offer, it is somehow still making a positive impact on someone's life. I'm actually not quite sure why the email was sent so late because I definitely did not stay up till 3am to send it! Ha.
There are others who are overcome by episodes of anxiety, tantrums, unreasonable fits... yet their lives speak of a perseverance and resilience that I greatly respect and wish I had even more of, as a Christian especially!
I remember several of our clients who came as free cases straight from an African refugee camp (no family here, no friends, barely any language capacity, if any at all) and the few that remained and lived together, one worked day and night shifts on a pay only slightly higher than minimum wage to survive, and covered rent for his "friend" whom he actually met at the refugee camp and had no family relations with. Talkin' about being sacrificial!
Those are probably some of the reasons why I enjoy my job despite the stress and sometimes mental take-home-workload. It has its rewards, but it is definitely a sobering reminder that as humans, we are very limited. Humanitarian work can really only go so far, and I know that ultimately, only Christ can offer lasting hope, joy, and peace that even a good life here in America cannot fulfill. It breaks my heart to hear of people suffering, getting beaten by cops for beliefs that ultimately do not lead to the one true God. It breaks my heart to see many coming to the U.S. not only for protection, but obsessively in search of the American dream that is not eternal (Matt 6:19-21).
I am still learning and exploring how to speak and act in a manner that is Gospel saturated in the context of social services. Many non-Christians in the non-profit sector, in fact most of them are not, are overflowing with love, care, and passion for people and various causes, but from a client's point of view, what distinguishes the Christian case worker from the love, care, and sacrifice of a non-Christian service provider?
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Therapeutical.
 |
| Classical Musicians Everywhere, London |
- raising the roof - ISSA SHORT ENTRY! pat pat to myself.
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Warriors of the Rainbow: Seediq Bale
It has already been three weeks or so since I've watched Seediq Bale and like always, I've had this half-written post sitting in my drafts for an equivalent length of time. This has got to be the first film I've seen in theaters presented in Japanese and Seediq with Chinese and English subtitles! The Seediqs are one of the aborigine groups in Taiwan, by the way. Usually, I do not write movie critiques. Actually I do not think this is even considered a movie critique, but I felt compelled to let out some circulating thoughts and images that are just about to cause my head and heart to explode. Slight exaggeration.
Underlying this movie, even in its epic, bloody glory, stands the seemingly overdone plot of a nationalistic-fueled war against unruly oppressors. Sad to say, (or is it?) it is the cliche fend-for-your-honor, gone-with-the-intruders plot, easily recognizable in other movies like Avatar? 300? Go a little further back, Pocahontas? What is sadder is that this type of plot has somehow become dull and "un-epic" because of overuse throughout the years. Not only that, each culture seemed to have adopted its own version of it! I wonder why people watch these movies: the acting? the action? While the general plot is completely predictable, Seediq Bale was yet another striking reminder of the sad historical brutality of imperialism that has at one point or another, made its gruesome mark all. over. this vast land we call earth. In fact, it has been such a prominent issue that people have been able to produce a multitude of movies based on the exact same theme in the context of their own culture. Perhaps some may find it uninteresting and way too predictable, but I think for those who have gone through such oppression, or are somehow well-acquainted with the history of their own kind, a theatrical performance like that of Seediq Bale could potentially speak semi-factually and emotionally on what has been silenced for years. Maybe, just maybe, doing those individuals the slightest justice in a matter that can never actually be reversed or mended.
Though it is heart-wrenching for me to put myself in the shoes of, in this case, the Sadeeqs, I cannot, in reality, fully comprehend the pains of what they have been through (as with other victims of imperialism). As a culturally somewhat confused individual, I do not know what it feels like to love a country, to be loyal to one culture, or to love my whatever "group" to the point of sacrificing myself in some glorious... battle, especially one that ultimately leads to a bloody death. Nationalist pride is somewhat of a foreign concept to me and would probably remain that way for the rest of my life.
Perhaps the one aspect I can identify with more is the internal conflict of one character in the movie. I am not sure where I am going with this, and I do not know whether I can even draw a conclusion, but it was interesting and thought provoking to say the least. This character, by blood a Seediq, but raised as a Japanese, pretty much served as a mediator, by will, between the Japanese military and Seediqs to ease the tension. However, when the uprisings occurred, he was conflicted to the depths of his soul and essentially copped out by killing his wife, his baby boy, and himself. Perhaps I used "cop out" too lightly and had undermined the pain of such internal conflict, but it happened. What was interesting is that he helped the Seediqs in obtaining the weaponry they would need for the battle and even endangered his wife in the process. However, in the end, he committed seppuku, a noble, prideful, yet brutal suicidal method of the Japanese. Talkin' about an identity crises...
Unfortunately, since it has been almost a month, my initial emotions and thoughts kind of faded, which is why I usually try to seize the moment and spill them out - failed attempt this time around. But I suppose I will share what's left of them in regards to this movie.
I only learned after watching the movie that I had watched the condensed theatrical version of it. It was originally split into two parts, just like Red Cliff (but of course, it's John Woo). Part I is entitled "The Flag of Sun" and Part II, "Crossing the Rainbow", which stood out significantly to me. The rainbow bridge apparently is an important part of the Seediq culture and belief. The bottom line is that the rainbow bridge serves as a connection between life on earth to the heavenly hunting grounds, as the Seediqs are characterized by fearless hunting and decapitating. Yes, you heard me, decapitation was abundant in the movie. The Seediqs had some mind-blowing willingness to sacrifice: loose-loose situation in the fight against the Japanese, the women's unselfish suicides to relieve their husbands and sons of the burden of food and worry... not uncommon I suppose for such a cause. However, what was most gripping for me was when the women who were preparing for mass suicide said "we'll be waiting for you at the other end of the rainbow bridge". Why? They were all sacrificing for a noble cause, I guess, but at the end of the day, there is no rainbow bridge, there is no heavenly hunting grounds, and they will not be reunited with each other after crossing the supposed rainbow bridge. No, as much as I wish it were untrue, their sacrifices were ultimately in vain. That, brought quite some grief. Somehow, this seeming momentary passion, care, and heart break for the lost always manages to dwindle to a fear of man once snapped back into reality. However, the current state of the lost is no different than that of the Seediqs, right? I hope the weightiness I felt when watching the movie would, with the Spirit's empowerment, manifest itself in my interaction with unsaved friends, family, and strangers.
Interestingly enough, I stayed at a "Home stay" (民宿) called "Crossing the Rainbow Bridge" when I visited Taroko Gorge in Taiwan last December and learned of the significance of well, crossing the rainbow bridge, from the owner, who was an aborigine of Tai Lu Ge tribe! The Tai Lu Ge people share many similarities in culture, language, and beliefs with the Seediqs. By the way, I highly recommend this home stay if you ever visit the area. I also have the contact for our taxi-tour guide. He was a superb individual. We also recently bought some green tea grown in Wu She 務社 - only the location of the "Wushe incident" in which the entire "The Flag of Sun" was based on...
Anyway, those were just side ramblings. Like many others, I honestly wouldn't have known about that incident, the Seediqs, or the significance of the rainbow in their context, had it not been for this movie! I do very much prefer the rainbow in a Biblical context though. I hope to watch the movie in its original form, just like red cliff (one of my all-time favorites by the way) - TWO PARTS. Perhaps it would flow better and I would have a much better grasp of the historical background and characters behind it. Holla if you want to join!
Here are some reads on the movie in English or Chinese, the Seediqs, Wushe Incident...
Why yes, by reads, I do mean wikipedia.
I leave you with one of the theme songs I listened to obsessively for a period of time: "Seeing the Rainbow", sung in Seediq. Beautiful, but evidently very sullen as it describes their ancestors summoning them across the rainbow bridge...
Sorry for the un-thought-out post. I suppose it is sufficient for my own future reference though. A bit tired as of late, and with much more important things to digest from the recent Young Adult Network retreat.
Underlying this movie, even in its epic, bloody glory, stands the seemingly overdone plot of a nationalistic-fueled war against unruly oppressors. Sad to say, (or is it?) it is the cliche fend-for-your-honor, gone-with-the-intruders plot, easily recognizable in other movies like Avatar? 300? Go a little further back, Pocahontas? What is sadder is that this type of plot has somehow become dull and "un-epic" because of overuse throughout the years. Not only that, each culture seemed to have adopted its own version of it! I wonder why people watch these movies: the acting? the action? While the general plot is completely predictable, Seediq Bale was yet another striking reminder of the sad historical brutality of imperialism that has at one point or another, made its gruesome mark all. over. this vast land we call earth. In fact, it has been such a prominent issue that people have been able to produce a multitude of movies based on the exact same theme in the context of their own culture. Perhaps some may find it uninteresting and way too predictable, but I think for those who have gone through such oppression, or are somehow well-acquainted with the history of their own kind, a theatrical performance like that of Seediq Bale could potentially speak semi-factually and emotionally on what has been silenced for years. Maybe, just maybe, doing those individuals the slightest justice in a matter that can never actually be reversed or mended.
Though it is heart-wrenching for me to put myself in the shoes of, in this case, the Sadeeqs, I cannot, in reality, fully comprehend the pains of what they have been through (as with other victims of imperialism). As a culturally somewhat confused individual, I do not know what it feels like to love a country, to be loyal to one culture, or to love my whatever "group" to the point of sacrificing myself in some glorious... battle, especially one that ultimately leads to a bloody death. Nationalist pride is somewhat of a foreign concept to me and would probably remain that way for the rest of my life.
Perhaps the one aspect I can identify with more is the internal conflict of one character in the movie. I am not sure where I am going with this, and I do not know whether I can even draw a conclusion, but it was interesting and thought provoking to say the least. This character, by blood a Seediq, but raised as a Japanese, pretty much served as a mediator, by will, between the Japanese military and Seediqs to ease the tension. However, when the uprisings occurred, he was conflicted to the depths of his soul and essentially copped out by killing his wife, his baby boy, and himself. Perhaps I used "cop out" too lightly and had undermined the pain of such internal conflict, but it happened. What was interesting is that he helped the Seediqs in obtaining the weaponry they would need for the battle and even endangered his wife in the process. However, in the end, he committed seppuku, a noble, prideful, yet brutal suicidal method of the Japanese. Talkin' about an identity crises...
Unfortunately, since it has been almost a month, my initial emotions and thoughts kind of faded, which is why I usually try to seize the moment and spill them out - failed attempt this time around. But I suppose I will share what's left of them in regards to this movie.
I only learned after watching the movie that I had watched the condensed theatrical version of it. It was originally split into two parts, just like Red Cliff (but of course, it's John Woo). Part I is entitled "The Flag of Sun" and Part II, "Crossing the Rainbow", which stood out significantly to me. The rainbow bridge apparently is an important part of the Seediq culture and belief. The bottom line is that the rainbow bridge serves as a connection between life on earth to the heavenly hunting grounds, as the Seediqs are characterized by fearless hunting and decapitating. Yes, you heard me, decapitation was abundant in the movie. The Seediqs had some mind-blowing willingness to sacrifice: loose-loose situation in the fight against the Japanese, the women's unselfish suicides to relieve their husbands and sons of the burden of food and worry... not uncommon I suppose for such a cause. However, what was most gripping for me was when the women who were preparing for mass suicide said "we'll be waiting for you at the other end of the rainbow bridge". Why? They were all sacrificing for a noble cause, I guess, but at the end of the day, there is no rainbow bridge, there is no heavenly hunting grounds, and they will not be reunited with each other after crossing the supposed rainbow bridge. No, as much as I wish it were untrue, their sacrifices were ultimately in vain. That, brought quite some grief. Somehow, this seeming momentary passion, care, and heart break for the lost always manages to dwindle to a fear of man once snapped back into reality. However, the current state of the lost is no different than that of the Seediqs, right? I hope the weightiness I felt when watching the movie would, with the Spirit's empowerment, manifest itself in my interaction with unsaved friends, family, and strangers.
Interestingly enough, I stayed at a "Home stay" (民宿) called "Crossing the Rainbow Bridge" when I visited Taroko Gorge in Taiwan last December and learned of the significance of well, crossing the rainbow bridge, from the owner, who was an aborigine of Tai Lu Ge tribe! The Tai Lu Ge people share many similarities in culture, language, and beliefs with the Seediqs. By the way, I highly recommend this home stay if you ever visit the area. I also have the contact for our taxi-tour guide. He was a superb individual. We also recently bought some green tea grown in Wu She 務社 - only the location of the "Wushe incident" in which the entire "The Flag of Sun" was based on...
Anyway, those were just side ramblings. Like many others, I honestly wouldn't have known about that incident, the Seediqs, or the significance of the rainbow in their context, had it not been for this movie! I do very much prefer the rainbow in a Biblical context though. I hope to watch the movie in its original form, just like red cliff (one of my all-time favorites by the way) - TWO PARTS. Perhaps it would flow better and I would have a much better grasp of the historical background and characters behind it. Holla if you want to join!
Here are some reads on the movie in English or Chinese, the Seediqs, Wushe Incident...
Why yes, by reads, I do mean wikipedia.
I leave you with one of the theme songs I listened to obsessively for a period of time: "Seeing the Rainbow", sung in Seediq. Beautiful, but evidently very sullen as it describes their ancestors summoning them across the rainbow bridge...
Sorry for the un-thought-out post. I suppose it is sufficient for my own future reference though. A bit tired as of late, and with much more important things to digest from the recent Young Adult Network retreat.
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